Fking. Spurs. The. End.

Ok fine, they deserved to win. As much as I love the Suns, I’m almost glad the big “Shaqtus” came to town and laid an egg. It disgusted me the way he dissed his former teammates as being D-League rejects.

Somewhere in the world, Shawn Marion is giggling to himself…

In regards to the Mavs, well, what can you say about that? They choked. Again. Thankyouforplaying.

• I really REALLY really wish I had pic-in-a-pic on the TV in my bedroom so I could watch the Celtics/Hawks game and Gossip Girl at the same time. Instead, I’m going to be flipping channels for an hour. Le sigh.
• Dear Pat Reilly - Na na na na, na na na na, hey hey hey, goodbye… (or at least goodbye until Wade and Beasley bring the team back to playoff form)
• Jay-Z adds more fuel to DeShawn Stevenson’s already overinflated ego by penning him a diss tune.
• Primoz Brezec dances on Sam Vincent’s grave.
• Oh Chuck Bass, how I love thee…
• The Celtics are currently trailing the Hawks. I swear if they go toe up in the first round, I’m going to go completely and 100% batshit crazy.
• This just in. Zaza is dead to me. You DARE head butt KG, sucker? Actually, lets just save ourselves some time. I declare the entire Hawks team to be dead to me. That should about cover it.

Cavs v. Wiz

• Delonte West. I told you he’d be good for something someday! He wasn’t my favorite Celtic pre-KG for no reason bitches. ;) Hell fking YEAH baby.
• It occurs to me that the more people hate on DeShawn Stevenson, the more he loves it. He has “star player wannabe” syndrome and he has it bad. He can shoot the 3 and sometimes look spectacular doing it, but he’s not Lebron. Not Kobe. He’s not even Gilbert Arenas. He’s DeShawn. A sometimes hot 3-point shooter. I wish he’d stop growing gnatty beards, shaving mohawks into his dome, crankin dat with soulja boy and most of all, I really wish he’d stop it with the “you can’t see me” hand in the face waggle. It’s just embarrassing.

Suns v. Spurs

• I approached this game as one would approach a funeral they were dreading. I wear black all the time, so it was hard to tell, but I was preparing myself for more circus shots from Tony Pah-Kah, incessant flop calls for Manu, tricky little hook shots from Timmayyyyyyy, dirty elbows and knees from Bowen and dagger 3’s from Big Shot Bob and the non-commentating Barry brother. Imagine my giddy surprise when the Suns beat down the Spurs like they were all carrying baseball bats… Even friggin Shaq was hitting free throws… well enough of them anyway. Why can’t the Suns do this every game? Why wait until they’re almost eliminated? It’s so infuriating. Oh well, I’ll take it.

Racing

• IRL - Wait, when did Dan Weldon get married?
• Sprint Cup (Talledega) - YAY Kyle Bush!
• Nationwide (Talledega) - Dario!

Random note

• Forget what I said about Al Horford being a class act. He’s dead to me. The playoffs will do that to you. No offense, Al. Josh Smith is also public enemy #1 and he is dead to me also. (haha)

• WTH is wrong with the Pistons? Seriously. I am 100% a Celtics fan, but I’ve always had a ton of respect for the Pistons. Still do, but sweet jesus what’s their problem? They need to find some consistency in a bottle and drink it till they puke.
• ESPN really pounds the shizniz out of a story once they get their teeth into it don’t they? Yes yes, I know that’s a ‘thank you captain friggin obvious’ statement, but it honestly never ceases to amaze me how they handle it when they think they have “the big scoop” on something. What I’m referring to here is the “Josh Howard smokes weed and says the whole league does too” story. According to the blogosphere, its old news blah blah blah. I can’t believe that in addition to yammering about it all day on ESPN tv and radio, they grilled Devin Harris about it on the sidelines of the Mavs/Horns game. I thought he handled it really well. Just said J-Ho is a dude who speaks his mind yada-yada. Speaking of that game…
• Damp totally chucked little Chris Paul out the effing way at the end of that game. Pargo and Chandler immediately jumped to his defense. See, that’s what the Mavs were supposed to do when West put his grubby paws all over Dirk’s face. It’s called having your teammates back.
• Right now, I’m watching the Suns/Spurs. Fking Spurs.
• Bowen. Grrrrr. How I hate thee, let me count the ways.
• Van Gundy’s calling the game. Sweet. He’s so quotable, I hope he never goes back to coaching.
• The Spurs are ahead by 8 already and Duncan just slammed one square in STAT’s face. Aye yay yay.
• As my New England brethran would say, “That Tony Pah-kah is a little pish-ah.”
• Oh so last night’s Cavs/Wiz game… Mmmm yeah. Not so much. I’m fine with Caron and Agent Zero. I even respect the hell out of Antawn Jamison despite his bad taste in choosing a college to play for (haha). But, DeShawn Stevenson just needs to shut his blowhole already. He can hit a million threes and waggle his hand in front of his bearded grill all he wants, he’s never going to be good enough to step up to Lebron. It’s just a fact of life. It is what it is. Thanks for playing DeShawn, but grab your marbles and go home.

Celtics v. Hawks

• KG just dragged the whole team out onto the floor to join his acceptance for the Defensive Player of the Year award. Love that man like a long lost play cousin.
• I love the James Posey hug. His bobblehead should be hugging something. Maybe not Benny the Bull, but anything else.
• Hey Mike Bibby, up yours.
• I do like Al Horford though. He’s a class act.
• Smith knocks down Pierce. Refs act deaf-dumb-blind. Tommy Heinsohn screams for the flagrant call and ouster… Pierce to the locker room.
• Ok that’s it. WTF. Do.not.eff.with.the.truth.
• We’re just toying with them now. Like a kitty with a little catnip mouse.
• Sam Cassell w/eight points in two minutes. Say goodnight Atlanta.
• I didn’t pony up for NBA-TV this season, but the Yahoo! boxscore tells me that by half-time the bad boys of Detroit personally rounded up the Sixers and made them their bitch.
• Cassell administers the justice for PP by knocking Josh Smith in the head. Message delivered.
• Split screen NBA playoffs commercial w/Derek Fisher and Marcus Camby - Just noticed that their mustaches line up perfectly. Inane enough tidbit for you?
• Eddie House is married to Mike Bibby’s sister? How did I not know that? Wait, I don’t give a shit. That’s probably why. I still think Bibby can suck it.
• Ooops, got distracted by the Comcast SportsNet Celtics Live Blog. This Live Blog stuff is catching on like wildfire. This one is “Cover It Live,” the same as the Yahoo! one (except the moderators don’t actually show all the people bitching about their questions not showing up.)
• I don’t know about you, but I’m ready for them to bust out some GINO!

Ok, so this is a day late, whatev. I was going to blog about the Mavs/Horns and Spurs/Suns games last night and somehow ended up over at the Yahoo! Ball Don’t Lie Liveblog instead. That was a trip. First off, I have always loved Kelly Dwyer’s writing. Knowledgeable with just the right amount of jaded snarkitude. (If there’s such a thing as a blogger groupie, I might be a KD groupie. Not too proud to admit it. Lol. I also love Matt Watson’s stuff from DBB and HOOPSWORLD.) So when J.E. Skeets from The Basketball Jones took on the Editor role over there I was skeptical to say the least. Nothing against Skeets, but I didn’t know jack about him. Eventually I broke down and listened to some Basketball Jones podcasts and now I’m sickeningly hooked. It’s like crack. I don’t know why its so good, it just is. The idea of two Canadian dudes sitting around yacking about hoops doesn’t exactly scream “party time” but it actually is extremely entertaining. But, I digress… so I find out during my daily BDL perusal that the guys are Liveblogging it so I decide to check it out once again (I went to the last one as well). Last night it was Skeets, KD and guest chatter, Matt Moore from Hardwood Paroxysm… also making cameos were Jamie Mottram (Mr. Irrelevant, Yahoo!) and Unsilent Majority (KSK). It was entertaining, but I have some advice for future Liveblogs. They need to send a memo to random un-famous bloggers/readers that their comments will not be posted 9 times out of 10. It really felt like the entire night was those guys chatting to each other with the masses bitching that their posts weren’t showing up. To be fair to the BDL guys, the comments from “the outside” were pretty inane or painfully obvious. Samples…

1. “The Spurs are going to win!”
2. “The Suns don’t defend!”
3. “Shaq has a fat ass!” (Ok fine, I made that one up.)

Anyway, I didn’t intend this to be a review. Just sharing my evening. On to tonight…

Bibby is going down! How dare he call out Boston Celtic fans for being bandwagon fans??? That little bitch! Ok fine, he’s right a little bit. Last year I could’ve gotten tickets to the Celtics games an hour before the game if I wanted to. Now you practically have to be related to Doc Rivers to score a seat. WTF is up with that? You’re going to tell me you didn’t want to fork over the big bucks last season to see Sebastian Telfair dribble the ball down the court and chuck it up with 3 seconds on the clock? Screw you man. You’re not a real fan!

• Hollywood club du jour - Goa
• Justin Bobby cameo. Oh the humanity!
• Watching this show, you really get the impression that these chicks just hang & fold designer clothes all day and then party all night in fabby LA clubs. Wait, I guess that is all they do.
• Microseries break: Holy Nick Lachey Batman… Did Alicia Keys just say, “email blast”? I just had a flashback that I was at work. Isn’t Nick Lachey too old to be on MTV? Don’t they shoot people after their 24th birthday? That’s what I heard.
• Audrina is batting her droopy eye(lashes) at Justin Bobby again. He must just giggle to himself to have such a willing doormat.
• Wow, Spencer out-bastarded himself this episode. Bravo Spencer bravo!
• The lease is running out… operation “phase out Audrina” in progress.
• Oh Stephen Colletti, be still my heart.

Cavs v. Wiz - Hey DeShawn, shave your face. The Wiz are out like gangbusters. I’m turning this bitch at 8pm to watch Gossip Girl, so hopefully the Cavs can get their shit together while I’m gone. I’ve already forgotten who’s playing next, but The Hills are on later too so I might have to miss some of that game too. I really need a DVR or TiVo. Only reason I haven’t gotten one by now is that I know I’ll tape a bunch of crap that I’ll never watch. [Checking in after halftime - The Cavs are up by 15. Sweet cherry pie. CW keeps airing a commercial for some show called "Farmer Wants A Wife" or some horseshit like that. WTF? Who watches that piss? Wait, me? Mmm, guilty. Not this time though, even I have standards -- low as they are.]

Raps v. Magic - Went out to lunch and missed most of the game. The Magic won which wasn’t a suprise I suppose, but I always expect the Magic to collapse, so maybe it was.

Nuggets v. Lakers - The Lakers were more charming when they were the underdog. Now they’re a little obnoxious. The Nuggets drive me insane though. What a waste of talent. It was classy though of the Laker fans to chant D.U.I. when Melo was shooting free throws. Maybe when they play in Colorado, the fans there will chant RA.P.E. at Kobe. On a completely random note, I love Jeff Van Gundy as an analyst. Who knew the dude was so damn funny? He’s almost as piss-your-pants-funny as Barkley.

Pistons v. Sixers - DBB is right… Jason Maxiell does indeed eat babies. Sheed just drained a 3. Its almost not fair. If I didn’t bleed Celtics green, I’d be a hardcore Pistons fan. They do everything right. [Update: Sweet jesus, what happened? How do the Pistons lose to the Sixers... How?]

Celtics v. Hawks - We better win or I’ll go apeshit. Just sayin.

Cavs v. Wiz - Neither team looks all that great actually. But, in this matchup, I’m rooting for the Cavs. Lebron is obviously Lebron, but I’ve loved Delonte West since he was a Celtic and I dig Boobie Gibson too. Also, Gilbert Arenas is turning into a wack job and DeShawn Stevenson has a godawful hairy beard and big fat mouth.

Suns v. Spurs - Fucking Spurs. The End.

Mavs v. Hornets - Currently watching this one. Initial thoughts are that the Mavs look better and will probably win. I’m not sure how the Hornets came into the playoffs with the #2 seed. They just don’t play like they’re that good. [Update: Forget everything I just said. Its like I was on crack or something. The Hornets won and look fan-fking-tastic. Forget "whoa Kobe"... WHOA Chris effing Paul. Sweet baby jesus.]

Recent NBA news - 1) Isiah Thomas finally got the boot. About friggin time. 2) J.J. Redick finally got some playing time the other night and went off for a career high 18 points. About friggin time.